This is my personal story about what it's like to find out you have a Stage 3 cancer and the journey you take to overcome it... only to find a year later it has spread, so you now have a Stage 4 cancer. It's not all doom and gloom, but the joy of sharing with good friends and feeling the love and support that they so freely give!
Friday, July 25, 2008
Thurs, July 24, 2009 - Will add a real entry soon!
And a big hi to everyone out there in cyberland!! I know, I know... I'm long overdue for a blog entry... and more than a couple of you have been sending emails wondering WHEN am I going to update the blog??? My bad!! Do you have any idea how often I've been meaning to come here and put in an entry to let you all know how I'm doing?? But for whatever reason, I haven't been at home, or I have and have been so exhausted that I've ended up sleeping almost around the clock... then next thing I figure I have days and days worth of entries to catch up on... and voila, here we are with still not an entry and people wondering what's happened to me.
Well, I can honestly report, I'm still here in the land of the living. Yes, I'm still recovering from the surgery, but for the most part, that is coming along nicely... just taking a lot longer than I thought... but then, duh!, I just found out this week that the surgery was considered a "major operation" and here I thought it was just a little old snip and tuck kind of surgery. So it's no wonder that it's taking longer for a complete recovery than I had planned on.
Anywho... I promise that in the next couple of days I will do a proper blog update, complete with some pictures. The next couple of days are going to be insane... what with the TUTS shows, a wedding on Saturday, not being able to come home Saturday night because of the Fireworks competition (yes, for the first time in all these years, the USA will be competing this year and their night is Saturday), a baby shower on Sunday, and then back to the theatre on Monday. Somewhere in there, I'm also suppose to be resting. Ha!!
Sooooo, if I can't do up a blog entry tomorrow (Fri), then don't be too concerned if the next one isn't early next week after all this crazy weekend activity.
Likewise, for those of you who have sent email asking if I'm ok... if I haven't answered your email, please have patience with me... I WILL get to the mail and updating the blog soon :)
Have a great weekend, everyone!!
Cheryl
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Saturday, July 12th, 2008 - Quickie Update
I beez bad! I realized (as well, it was brought to my attention) that I hadn't updated the blog for a few days... which is my bad since so many of you have said how you keep regular contact with the blog to see how I'm doing... and if I haven't updated it, then one doesn't know whether to worry or to assume that things are going great and I'm too busy to do any updates :)
Well, I'm happy to report that no one has to worry... I'm doing quite fine. I still have pain, but no where near what I was going through the first 10 days after the surgery. The pain I have now is pain that I had assumed I would have about 3-4 days after the surgery... not 12 days after the surgery!! But, as my friend Roger explained... when doing any surgical work around the kidney area, this is grounds for a lot of pain. So why didn't my surgeon explain this to me so that I could have been better prepared for what I went through??? And why the attitude that I shouldn't be in the kind of pain I was in, when it was obvious that this would not be unusual??
Anywho... on Friday night, I had my friend Greg pick me up and take me down to TUTS and I watched the show Jesus Christ Superstar. It was thoroughly enjoyable, even though it isn't one of my favourite shows, per se. On opening night, apparently they had quite a few technical difficulties, especially with the sound, but on Friday night, I didn't notice any of that so the show went very smoothly and was enjoyable to watch.
Hahahaha... there was a price to pay for me being out in the fresh air until so late Friday night. I pretty much slept ALL day today. I got up around 4pm... just in time to throw some clothes on and Greg was back to pick me up to go watch Annie Get Your Gun tonight.
I was really bummed out that I had to miss both Opening Nights since I just was in too much pain and not feeling up to being able to go. So it was a real treat for me to go Friday night to see JCS and tonight to see AGYG. Annie blew me away with just how pretty this show is... and obviously I am not the only one to agree... check out th review by copy and pasting this link into your browser:
http://snipr.com/2wx9w
If I wasn't so tired right now, I would code the above link so that all you have to do is click on it, but it is going on 2am and I really must go to bed. I already know I'm going to be paying for being out so late tonight, and being out in the fresh air all evening. Chances are I am going to have to sleep most of the day away tomorrow!
But being down at the Park with all my friends definitely has been the best dose of medicine since I've had the surgery done!! THIS is what my life is all about and being down with my friends actually helped me forget about the pain for awhile... well, if not able to forget about it, it was easier to cope with it. My dear friend Greg drove me to the Park both nights and my dear friend Shelley (who choreographed Annie Get Your Gun and who's husband, Stefan, is in Jesus Christ Superstar) drove me home both nights. I'm not quite up to driving anywhere yet ;)
Ok... a wonderful evening for sure!! And Toby, who had Bridget out this afternoon on their 2 hour hike, brought her down to the park. Bridget, of course, was right at home since being the Box Office dog mascot is her old stomping grounds... but when she saw me in the Garden Cafe outdoor concession area, she dragged Toby to me, whining and barking in excitement ... "That's my mom!!" It was sooo cute!! Of course, as soon as she got to me and smothered me in kisses, she insisted on my buying a cheeseburger so she could help share it with me :)
Toby and Bridget stayed for a short visit and rest stop, then they walked back home and Toby fed her her dinner which I had prepared for her and kept in the fridge. All is well and everyone is getting looked after :)
Ciao for now!
Cheryl
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Wednesday, July 9th, 2008 -- More Drama!
Yes, far be it from me to have a quiet week... any week! There's always some drama going on! Well, after the surgery, which should be enough drama in anyone's life, I come back home which has got to be better than suffering in agony at the hospital. I still can't get over the fact I couldn't get anyone to hear me, when I say I'm in pain... then listen people, I'm in pain!! I think the medical profession, no matter what position, has gotten so used to hearing people complain about pain that they no longer listen... and that is a sad state of affairs. Ok, granted, I realize that there are people who will complain over a hangnail or a paper cut... and they will whimper and complain as if this is a life-threatening situation... so I can understand where the doctors and nursing staff tend to turn a blind eye... but to the point that everyone who complains is obviously guilty of whining and sniveling over "nothing"??
Ok... so what was my next drama?? It happened yesterday, Tuesday afternoon. I had called my doctor on Monday to tell him that I had about 10 or more staples in my 4 small laproscopic incisions and they were suppose to come out a week after the surgery... which would have made them due to come out on Monday.. the day I was calling. The only catch, contrary to popular belief and the fact a whole week had passed, I was still in intense pain and there was no way I could get up to his office to see him and have him take out the staples. No problem... he will come over to my apartment on Tuesday, around noon. Problem solved.
So, sure enough, he came over but it was closer to 12:45pm... which now has put him behind schedule since he has an appt. at 1:00pm back in the office. Anywho... he did take the staples out and I was trying to explain to him my trials and tribulations of the last week... meanwhile, each staple he plucked out really hurt! Especially from the larger of the four incisions. Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!! And I don't think he was really listening to my complaints of the past week because he was in a hurry to get back to the office.
So, he left and I ended up falling asleep because I do get tired pretty easily. I woke up about 2 hours later, and with a little difficulty (because of the pain factor), I got out of bed and went over to the mirror. I thought I should check the incisions to see if I should put on a light dressing or if they were all looking fairly dry and having them uncovered would be best. Well, I'm not sure if any of you can imagine this... imagine as you touch the area, before your very eyes the longest incision just up and opens up... so now you are looking at a gaping hole. HELLO??? 8 days of staples and it's as if not a bit of healing had happened!
Well, you will be proud to know I did not panic :) It was more like, "Well, sheeeeeit! What more can happen???" I figured that this isn't something I should now just slap a dressing on... I better go to Emergency and have them deal with it. So, I called Mimi upstairs and asked her if Nathan took their vehicle to work or not... turns out he hadn't. So I asked her if she would take me to St. Paul's Emergency just up the street? Of course she would! I told her to give me a few minutes... that I wanted to change into more suitable PJs for going to the hospital. Also, Toby and Bridget were out for their afternoon hiking adventure so I had to make Bridget's dinner and leave a note for Toby to explain where I was and for her to feed Bridget when she got home :)
Of course, now it meant having to go down the 9 stairs and then into Mimi's vehicle. It is a small van, so we took a Rubbermaid step stool that I have. Considering the pain I was in (nothing to do with the incision), I was very pleased with how I managed to get down the flight of stairs... and then into the van. Once in the van, I changed our plans... let's go to Emergency at VGH rather than St. Paul's since VGH is obviously going to have the latest medical reports on moi since I was there last week for the surgery that caused this incision.
Well, as is known in Emergency units across the continent... the US and Canada, there is nothing "emergency" about them. You KNOW you are going to have to sit and wait! So, I am glad I brought my book (still reading Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett). There was a LOT of waiting around before I was actually seen by anyone.
4 hours later, the end result was they agreed that the incision was now open and that there was nothing that could be done about it. Apparently, once an incision is open after having been stapled or stitched... they can't re-do the staples or stitches. The doctor had a nurse put teri-tape strips across the wound/incision and apply a light dressing. I can change the dressing as needed (IE: after a shower should it get wet). Obviously, I won't be allowing the shower water to hit directly on the area, but should it get damp, then I would change it to keep the area dry.
So, I then called Mimi and told her I was ready to be picked up... and she hopped in her van and came back to pick me up. By the time I got home, I was tired... but more so, I think I was tired from the pain, not anything else!
This morning, I woke up and felt a lot better. We shall see if this lasts through the day. But the pain this morning appears to be in just one area. Does this mean the worst is over??? Keep your fingers crossed and those positive thoughts coming in that we are seeing the end of the pain!!
Dad is coming over this morning to check up on me. I'm not sure if I have time to have a nap before he gets here or not
Ciao for now!
Cheryl
Monday, July 7, 2008
Monday, July 7th, 2008 -- I'm HOOOOOOME!
Yes, I'm home and what an experience this has been. Since I can only sit for very short periods of time, I'm not going to be able to go into any big detail of this past week for awhile, but I did want to check in to let you all know that I am home now.
Pat and Dad picked me up on Saturday. I'm not sure if my favourite Ikea commercial is aired down in the States but for those of you up here in the Vancouver lower mainland area, you'll know which one I'm talking about. It's where the lady who dresses sort of out of the 50's, has those retro 50's glasses and she looks at her bill and thinks that the cashier has made a big mistake since she paid so little... so next thing you see her... running out of the store in a mincing kind of run because she's wearing high heels, shouting, "Start the car!! Start the car!!!" Her husband is in the car in the parking lot, reading the paper when he hears his wife shouting this, so revs up the engine picks her up and they speed off, with her shouting "Whoooooo! Whooooo!" It is such a stupid commercial but it makes me laugh every time. Sooooo, as Pat is pushing my wheelchair down the hallway, she starts running with it to get me out of the hospital (I had such a horrible time at this particular University hospital) and I'm shouting... "Start the car!! Start the car!!" :D Ok, I guess you had to be there
Anywho, as Dad said, I came back on Saturday late afternoon. Was I ready to be discharged? I don't think so, but by then I was soooo fed up with the staff and their lack of common sense, not to mention the intense pain I was in that I kept trying to explain to them and not one of them seemed to take me seriously. They all pretty much figured that I had had this laproscopic surgery so the pain I had should have been gone in 2-3 days. The problem was, it HADN'T left and although the surgeon put me on two very powerful narcotic painkillers, they didn't appear to be working, yet no one would believe me.
I don't know what they thought... but I do believe some prejudice came into play here. I think the staff in this second hospital were thinking that I was this "fat" girl who obviously was lazy and didn't want to do stairs and preferred to stay in the hospital... because their textbooks said that after surgery it would take X amount of days to get the pain under control and since I didn't fall into a classic textbook case, then I wasn't to be believed. Oh, the stories I could tell you about my 2 1/2 day stay at UBC Hospital, the hospital out at the University of BC... and once I have a bit more stamina and can sit at the computer longer, I'm sure you will be hearing about it. Meanwhile, the staff and Vancouver General Hospital (VGH), well, I have nothing but wonderful things to say about them!!
As for my surgeon, Dr. Meneghetti... I'm torn here. On the one hand, he did a FABULOUS job of the surgery. The adrenal gland is a gland that is very difficult to get at. There is an adrenal gland attached to each kidney, but in an awkward position. There are a lot of blood vessels and arteries in the area, plus other organs. To get at it, they have to blow the area up with air, so they can push organs around and out of the way... and then they have to get through the multiple blood vessels and veins, to detach the gland (when they do get at it) from the kidney, then sew up the kidney. This is all done laproscopically with a camera and tools. He told me that they had to dig deeper and move things around more, BUT he managed to get the gland and tumour out in one piece. Later, a resident who was in the OR during the surgery came into my room to talk to me and he seemed really excited about how the surgery went. Obviously, this is not a surgery that a lot of residents or surgeons get to see/do since taking out an adrenal gland is not a common surgery. So he told me how exciting it was to see Dr. Meneghetti get at the adrenal gland that was very difficult to get at and managed to extract it with the tumour intact... as well, they cut a large section around the tumour of tissue from the kidney as well as the tissue surrounding the gland. The tumour appeared to be very hard and the margins very clean which is a good sign the tumour is intact and has not spread anywhere. We won't know for sure until the report comes back from pathology, but the resident was very hopeful that all was clean. It had never entered my mind that it wouldn't have come out all intact... wow ... I never thought of the possibility that it might have already started to spread! Anywho, I seemed to get more information from the resident than I did Dr. M. Apparently Dr. M. is a man of few words... so I know I shouldn't take any of this personally.
But, the pain went on and they did try me on different pain meds to try and get it under control. Now, for those who know me, I have always had a high tolerance to pain, which means the pain has got to be pretty strong for me to notice it as pain. For me to be in intense pain, well, this is just something I have never experienced before in my life... and I have to wonder how someone who doesn't have a high tolerance to pain would do?? Because of this high tolerance to pain, it means I also have a high tolerance to drugs.. it takes a lot more for them to work on me when I need them... so I know Dr. M and the hospital staff were having a hell of a time trying to get some and at a dosage that would work on me. We never did really find it. While I was on the pain pump at VGH and they were giving me Hydromorphone (the next level up from Morphine) and Oxycodone, I was doing somewhat ok, but only sporatically. They took me off the pain pump when I was being transferred to UBC and put me on two kinds of Oxycodone... a slow releasing oxycodone over 8 hours and then a break through oxycodone (15mg every 4 hours). So oxycodone was in my system 24/7! But this just wasn't working... and that's when I ran into trouble. By now I was at UBC and they thought this amount of narcotic should be working, so they never did try anything else or go back to the pain pump with the hydromorphone. So I really had intense pain... and I never did see my surgeon again because he was in surgery at VGH Thur and Fri.
Anywho... I could go on and on... and I am journaling this experience, so once I have finished writing it all out, I will more than likely bore you all with the journal so that I have it documented online.
BUT, the good news... today when I woke up from my afternoon nap, I actually noticed a huge difference! Oh sure, I've still got pain, but this was the kind of pain I was expecting on Day 2 or 3... not on Day 8. There's a definitely huge improvement!! So, the way I see it, it is finally starting to heal and that I bet I see a huge difference in the next couple of days. I think it's going to be one of those things where it doesn't slowly get better every day, but that it has been super intense and voila! almost overnight it will seem like it got better :)
But, for now... I have been up for the past 4 hours. I am about to have some dinner (I heated up some pre-made canneloni and Rose sauce) and then will go back to bed to read a bit. Hahaha.. I still have to write about how Bridget was soooo excited to come home, until she saw me. She ran over and put her front paws on my knees (I was sitting at the time) did a couple of excited whimpers, then looked at me as if to say, "I went for a walk with Auntie Joan and I never came home... and you didn't come to get me, so you abandoned me!!" She literally gave me the cold shoulder for the rest of the afternoon/evening. Hahaha... I went to bed and she stayed sleeping on the couch. So I went to bed. Sometime in the night, she came to bed... and I've been forgiven since :) Hahaha... I have lots of help with Bridget! Mimi takes her out for her morning walk to do her morning constitution and while they are out, I make Bridget's breakfast... then when they come home, Mimi puts her breakfast down for her. I can't bend to put the dish on the floor. In the afternoon, Toby comes and takes Bridget out for a 2 hour hike through the trails in Stanley Park... then same routine. I make her dinner and Toby puts it down for her. Then around 11pm, Jenn and her dog, Lexi, come downstairs and the three of them go out for the last walk of the evening. I'm usually in bed by then, but that's ok... Jenn takes the two dogs out and if I'm awake, comes by and sits on the bed for a visit. Bridget comes up on the bed and Lexi has a snooze on the bedroom floor :)
So there you have it... all is good! I can now tolerate the pain... and I have a goal. Not sure if I'm going to make it but it's something to work towards (being the lazy person I'm sure that UBC staff thought I was. Grrrrr!). I am hoping to be comfortable enough that I can go to the Opening Night of Annie Get Your Gun at the Park on Thursday night. I think the opening of Jesus Christ Superstar is pushing it a little since it is Wednesday night... but if I am really good and rest Tues, Wed and Thurs... I just might be able to pull it off. If not, I will still see it later. I am not going to work any of the performances until July 16th, so all is under control.
Ok... enough babbling... off I go to bed to watch a little tv and read a little (Pillars of Earth by Ken Follett... fabulous book!!!)
Ciao for now!
Cheryl
PS: Addendum: So much for a short note because I'm not sitting at the computer that long of a stretch
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Home sweet home
Ah at last some solid news to report. This afternoon Pat and I drove out to the UBC Hospital and picked up Cheryl for her ride home. Finally she has received a proper supply of her correct meds, so was feeling quite chipper when we got there and was able to get settled into a wheelchair for the journey to the car. The settling into the front seat was a bit of an adventure, but she did quite well and it was tally ho and away we go.
On arrival at her apartment there was a flight of about five steps upward, but she navigated these with no trouble and then we settled into her digs and chatted for about an hour or so, at which time it became apparent that the meds were wearing off and that she was getting to be in a bit of discomfort, so we provided her with the required pills and left her to have a rest. All in all she is in pretty good shape and is very happy to be back into her home territory.
On Monday she will be in contact with her GP and will attempt to coax him into making a house call to write out a prescription for more of the pain killer medicine and to remove the staples that are supposed to come out on that day. After that it will be a matter of resting and taking it easy as she regains her strength and she hopes to be up and around and enjoying her work with the Theatre Under the Stars in the near future.
She should be getting the results of the biopsy next week and this may reveal the source of the cancer cells that invaded the adrenal area and for various reasons this could be a significant revelation.
- Bill
Friday, July 4, 2008
Pain, pain, go away... come again another day (NOT)
Things have changed again and, in fact, I hesitate to give any guesses of what is about to happen as no one seems to know what they have in mind.
Cheryl was to be discharged today at 3:00 pm, but she is still in extreme pain and finally laid down the law to those at the UBC Hospital who seem to be totally ignoring her continual warnings of the pain; so she simply told them that she was refusing to go home as it would be totally impossible for her to cope there. Finally it seemed to get through to them that maybe she was not swinging the lead and was actually in pain, so she is now staying in the hospital and will until they are able to get the pain under control. They were planning to send her home with one day's supply of pain killer medicine with instructions for her to go to her GP if she needed more. She had to point out to them that GPs do not work on the weekend and just how was she supposed to get into his office in the first place? Her surgeon, who wrote out the one day prescription, is now back at VGH and out of reach so unable to amend the prescription to a proper amount; so the more we get into this saga the more eerie it appears to develop.
At this point I am unable to advise anyone of where or when she will be for the next day or so but she has promised to inform me of any new developments and I will let everyone know when that time comes. Isn't the BC medical system great?
- Bill
Pfft... not a happy camper
She was not and is not a happy camper at the new hospital as no one seemed to realize or care about the severe pain that she is experiencing and, regardless of how she is feeling, she is being discharged today around 3:00 pm and will be on her way home.
One of the reasons being given for getting her out of the hospital so quickly is that there is too much danger of picking up an infection in our places of healing and any infections, such as staph, would be a very serious problem for her.
I would imagine that she will be a pretty tired and worn out girl tonight and that those wishing to get in touch with her might best delay their visitations or phone calls until tomorrow.
- Bill