Thursday, June 21, 2007 - A week later...

Hiya Bloggy,

Hehehe... ok, I have had a gentle nudge (or was that a kick in the butt??) from my friend Chet who subtly reminded me that it's been a week since the last posting. I seriously have no idea where the time goes! I'm turning into being a bad blogger (grin)!!

Soooo what has gone on in the last week? Oh oh... chemo brain definitely makes remembering daily stuff a real challenge, so I won't even begin to try and remember what happened on what days! Suffice it to say, it's been a busy week.

The most important... I am FINISHED MY RADIATION/ORAL CHEMO treatments!!! YIPPPEEE!!! 25 sessions of 3 zaps from 3 different angles, so a total of 75 zaps are now completed! With the completion of the radiation is the completion of the oral chemo... both have caused some interesting side affects that I hope don't take too long to get rid of. The oral chemo has caused problems in both heels which makes walking a bit of a challenge. I also have all over muscle/joint pain which is probably caused by the combination of chemo/radiation and doesn't help that I also have the underlying issue of arthritis. The radiation also had just started to form a burn/rash on my lower left side, but Dr. Ma gave me a prescription cream and after two days that seemed to do the trick. Of course, even though I've stopped the radiation... it still continues to do it's thing for the next 2-3 weeks before my insides can even think of starting to heal. So I now get 4 weeks of no treatments... to let the radiation do it's thing...before going back on the 2 aggressive IV chemos. That will go until the middle of September. But hey, at least the daily radiation is now behind me!

I have also been working on Box Office processes/procedures for Theatre Under The Stars. This is like going down memory lane. I used to work with TUTS a kajillion years ago and had forgotten how beautiful it is in the middle of Stanley Park in the summer. Then to do theatre...what more could you want? The difference now is that I can't be there for every performance... I have to juggle my time so that I don't over commit myself and give me enough time for rest and getting through the chemo. But I have learned that the best things to keep my attitude up is to keep me busy with stuff I love doing... and working on shows with old friends is high up on that list :)

This is a picture of Malkin Bowl, aka as our outdoor theatre stage. Right now, it is not set up, so you can see the stage area is boarded up, as well there is no fencing or seats set up for the audience area.


Hehehe... this is a prime example of the results of all our Pacific Northwest rain. The plant life loves it and Stanley Park has oodles of varieties of plant life. This pond is just in front of where the box office will be.

This is the Stanley Park Pavillion. Notice just to the left of the yellow umbrella and underneath the windows there is an open door? That's our theatre office that we have our meetings at, answer phones, etc. A little trivia... this building was where my parents had their wedding reception almost 55 years ago.

Let's see... what else has happened. Oh, on Monday, I met up with some of my Hawaiian buddies. Peggy and Chris who live in Langley, Lynn and Darlene from Idaho, and John and Marge from California. The hotel that the 4 of them from out of town were staying at had a (gasp) Casino so guess where we all ended up spending hours at?? (grin) And yes, I did get lucky in that I hit a progressive jackpot for $1011... just in the nick of time because I was down to my last $38 :)

This is a picture of darling Otto and his mom, Darlene. We are at Chris and Peggy's new house that is still being built. Otto, Darlene and her husband, Lynn, are from Idaho and had driven up here.

I also met up with my friend, Robin-Eliece who is in town for two weeks. She is from Vancouver but currently living in Prague, Czech. So we got together and went out for lunch. She will be coming over here again this afternoon. Not sure what we will be doing because I'm a little tired. We may go out for an early dinner or just hang around here.

I also went out for a spur of the moment dinner with my friend, Doug the other night. Doug lives across the street from me and he had called to congratulate me for completing my radiation treatments. Since neither of us had eaten, we decided to go out for dinner.

Sooooo... that's about it for now! We shall see what the weekend brings :)

Ciao for now!

Cheryl

Thursday, June 14th, 2007 - Last Visit with Dr. Ma

Hiya Bloggy!

Hahaha... maybe I should change this to say it's a Once a Week blog rather than a daily journal? Then again, once summer is over and the winter blahs set in, it may very well go back to being a daily journal. I guess I should just leave it and we'll see how often it gets updated. The funny thing is.. when I do get over here to update it, I really enjoy the free-form forum where I can just start babbling and see where it takes me. Obviously, I don't have a structured way of reporting on the blog.

Now, I guess I haven't reported on formalities such as blood work and the like. So I should get that done. I have the last four weeks' blood work results which I keep forgetting to mention. HA! As time goes on, my memory is getting worse and worser :D I KNOW it is all because of the chemo and the impact chemo has on the brain, but golly gee whiz, it can throw a girl for a loop! I can see where, if one were to attempt to work during these treatments, it would be extremely frustrating for oneself and one's co-workers then the most obvious things are hard to remember. And concentration... not a chance! Ok, where was I? Oh yes... blood work results. I'll just list the main ones. I am STILL showing in the "normal" range which is phenomenal considering what my body, blood and immune system has been going through this past 5 weeks (more on that later with a report from what Dr. Ma, my radiation oncologist has to say).

Ok.. here are the results. The numbers in brackets are the "normal range"... the numbers with an asterisk are the numbers that have fallen out of the normal range.

May 22, 2007:

White Blood Cells (4.0 - 11.0) 5.5
Red Blood Cells (3.80 - 5.20) 4.52
Hemoglobin (115 - 155) 118
Hematocrit (.35 - .45) .365
Platelet Count (150 - 400) 269

Liver Function (40 - 95) 57

May 29, 2007:

White Blood Cells (4.0 - 11.0) 5.1
Red Blood Cells (3.80 - 5.20) 4.17
Hemoglobin (115 - 155) *111
Hematocrit (.35 - .45) *341
Platelet Count (150 - 400) 223

Liver Function (40 - 95) 57

June 6, 2007:

White Blood Cells (4.0 - 11.0) 4.7
Red Blood Cells (3.80 - 5.20) 4.22
Hemoglobin (115 - 155) *114
Hematocrit (.35 - .45) .354
Platelet Count (150 - 400) 235

Liver Function (40 - 95) 46

June 12, 2007:

White Blood Cells (4.0 - 11.0) 4.6
Red Blood Cells (3.80 - 5.20) 3.84
Hemoglobin (115 - 155) *109
Hematocrit (.35 - .45) *.328
Platelet Count (150 - 400) 245

Liver Function (40 - 95) 55

Soooo... the good news is that overall I've managed to keep pretty much in the "normal" range, which means my bone marrow has been producing the red/white blood cells it needs, as well as the platelets. This, in turn, has managed to fight off any bugs or infections that a normal, healthy immune system does on a daily basis. The fact there is some fluctuation there is due to the fact my system is being bombarded with both the chemo and the radiation, and has been bombarded with one or the other since early March and is still holding it's own. Yayayaya me!

Today was my 22nd radiation session... only 3 more to go to complete the radiation treatment. It was also my last visit with Dr. Ma, my radiation oncologist. He told me today that he is extremely impressed (and surprised) at just how well I am doing. The amount of radiation that I'm getting is pretty severe, as was the chemo I was on before starting the radiation. He told me that he has another patient, same age as I am, same kind of cancer. She was getting exactly the same treatment (dosage of radiation and dosage of oral chemo) that I am getting. After two weeks (10 sessions) he had to stop her radiation/chemo treatments and admit her to hospital. Her body just can't handle it at this high of a dosage. So she is now in the hospital, being rehydrated and medicated so they can get her in a condition where she hopefully can handle a much lesser dosage of the radiation and chemo. Then there's me... who is driving herself in every day, then driving herself home, still doing errands, grocery shopping, laundry, dog walks, etc. I laughed when, 2 weeks ago, they had a nutritionist meet with me to go over whether or not I had the energy to cook meals for myself, was I eating, did I need help in these things and should they arrange for some home care help. Of course, when the nutritionist met with me, she could see I was totally fine, and could easily be mistaken for a caregiver, not the patient (grin).

I tell you, I firmly believe that my success is because of my strong beliefs in the Laws of Attraction. You attract what you put out. As far as I'm concerned, I am one healthy female who was given this challenge but I will beat it and be healthier than ever. I do not dwell on how sick I should be... but rather on how healthy I should be :)

Dr. Ma even admitted he was surprised that I am doing so well... whereas I just assumed I'd do well and was wondering if I was being too much of a whiner with some of the side affects that I do have.

I have tenderness in my left side and now the skin is starting to break down on the front, left side. I have also been getting some bouts of diarrhea.. not too serious, but definitely a nuisance (hey, I have places to go, people to see!). Two of my main complaints are painful feet/legs which makes it a bit of a challenge to walk and lower back muscle pain on the left side. Dr. Ma explained why I was getting this.. basically, in a nutshell, the radiation is like a microwave. I am being cooked from the inside out. Now, at the end of my treatments we are starting to see the results of burning from the inside to the external skin. Inside it is much more serious and what I am feeling is the burned internal tissue. As for the lower back muscle pain.. one of the zaps is taken from underneath the radiation table through the back.. so the radiation is going through the muscles to get to the abdominal wall. Hence, those muscles are inflamed and burnt as well. The feet/leg pain is a result of the oral chemo and not the radiation. That is why he can't believe how well I'm doing because inside of me is the remains of a war zone :)

Anywho... Dr. Gill, my primary oncologist, is going to give my war zone a nice rest after the last radiation/chemo session. We need to give my body a fighting chance to bring down the internal swelling before we start up with the aggressive chemo again. So I get 4 weeks of NO TREATMENTS!! Yayayaya!

Hahaha... not that I'm going to be lazy. As I said in the previous entry, I will be involved with Theatre Under the Stars this summer. They are being very accommodating knowing that I will be going through chemo treatments while we do the shows. But what a great way of keeping myself distracted, eh?? :D

Oh... and I must share the little Diva's latest additions to her wardrobe :) My friend, Brisi, who lives in Tennessee has this wonderful website for pets --
PetPails.com is a great site for ordering gifts or treats for our loved critters. So check out the little diva (grin)...

Hehehe... those Desperate Housewives have nothing on Bridget!! Here she is in her Desperate Housedogs t-shirt!

This is going to be Bridget's way of joining a good cause! She is going to be quite the hit around the city in August when there's the big weekend walk for Breast Cancer Research!

Now, although you can't see the words on this one... on the back of the shirt, in sequins, is DIVA DOG. And that she is!

Well, again this has been longish, so I'll stop here :) Over and out...

Ciao!

Cheryl

Sunday, June 10th, 2007 - Nothing much new

Hiya Blogster,

There's not too much new to report but I relaized, once again, the days have gone by between posts. And, yes, trying to catch up is a bit difficult since (grin) I can't remember much past the last 24 hours.

This past week I completed the 4th week of radiation, so I have 7 more radiation sessions to go. 5 this coming week and 2 the week after. I think I've sailed through this pretty darn good. No major side affects other than I do get tired easily, I have problems with memory and concentration and the big challenge is walking. The walking challenge is not because of the radiation but because of the oral chemo. Sooooo, I think I may have mentioned at some point that Dr. Gill had changed my protocol with the chemo to only take it Mon-Fri, when I get the radiation, but to take a break from it on the weekends. When she made this change, it was not because of the feet, but so that I could regain some of my energy that has been very low. But alas, that hasn't seemed to help with the feet... OUCH!! The only way of describing it is, when I walk, besides the joint/arthritis pain in the knees/hips, every step I take it's like I am walking on a dozen tacks or nails in my heels. So one does not want to walk too far with that kind of pain. I do take pain killers (Tylenol #3 with codiene and/or Oxycodone with 400mg of Ibuprophen) which doesn't get rid of the pain 100%, but it does help, especially in the mornings.

Anywho... only 1 1/2 more weeks to go with the radiation/oral chemo and then Dr. Gill is going to put me on a 4 week break so that I can rebuild my system a bit before we start the aggressive IV chemos. The good thing with doing those, I'll be back on the steroids for 3 days our of every 14 day period... and those, not only help with the chemo side affects, but are miracle pills for the arthritis/joint pain. With a little bit of luck, the heel pain will be gone and Bridget and I can build up our walking regime again. Of course, the yucky trade-off is I will have to deal with that hypersensitivity to cold where I need to wear a glove to take anything out of the fridge and I can't drink anything cold. Yikes! With summer and the warmer weather here, I can't imagine how I'm going to survive with nothing cold to drink!

But... the above is my whining (grin). I try to offset that with keeping myself busy with stuff that doesn't require using my feet/legs, my memory, and/or the need for serious concentration LOL!!

So, this week (ok, I had to cheat and look at my appointment book - hahahaha!)... I met up with my Aunt Eileen and cousin Holly. I can't believe I took my camera to get some pictures, which of course I'd post here, and totally forgot I had brought my camera!! See what I mean?? Darn memory!! And I could have got some great ones of little diva Bridget telling off Holly's gorgeous black lab, Nelson. He is the sweetest black lab with a wonderful, calm, gentle temperment... but when Bridget would go out to explore the backyard, Nelson would follow her and hope that she would play with him. Instead, she would yell at him and tell him to back off... which he thought was her way of saying "Let's play!" Hahahaha... it was hilarious to watch them... as time went on, you could tell Bridget was not at all perturbed that Nelson was there, but she had to yell at him anyways just to remind him that SHE was the DIVA and HE was to listen to HER! I have no idea where/who she gets that attitude from!!! :) Anywho, Eileen, Holly and I had a wonderful visit and we really must get together more often. It's really hard though since Eileen lives on Saltspring Island and doesn't get to the mainland too often.

Now let's see... I think it was Wednesday that Nurse Donna was suppose to come over to flush out my portacath with saline solution, but lo and behold, Nurse Carol showed up. Now this is like a time warp!! Back in 2001 when I had the "Oops, sorry, wrong person" hysterectomy surgery, which ended up me having a major post-op infection... I had to have home care nursing for about 5 months for changing the wound dressings. Well, one of the nurses back then was Nurse Carol! That was 6 years ago!! As soon as we saw each other, we both recognized the other... and she was getting the feeling of deja vu when she came to the apartment building because she remembered being here before. Hahahaha... well, she's made an appt. to come back July 4th to do the portacath flushing again and it will be interesting to see whether her or Nurse Donna come because they both enjoy coming over because we get yakking (gee, who would have thunk poor, shy me would talk up a storm when they are here?). Carol and I had lots to talk about since we last saw each other. I sure enjoy those home care nurses...they are all so wonderful!!

Oh... and I met Kimberly, the Volunteer Co-Ordinator for TUTS (Theatre Under the Stars). Part of me keeping busy and getting out of the apartment is that I'm going to be involved with TUTS this year. One of the reasons is a lot of the people I did theatre with 25 years ago are involved and the other reason is I need to have something I can do in the summer that doesn't involve being out in the direct sunlight, since I (the sun goddess) are not allowed to be in the direct sun because of the reactions with the chemo. So TUTS will be perfect... I'll be with friends, it's in the evenings, and even though I will be there at 5pm or late afternoon... the sun will be behind the trees at that time so I won't be in the direct sunlight. Perfect! Of course, it will be interesting at night when it cools down... I'll have to be careful with the hypersensitivity to the cold. I'll probably be the only one there with a pair of wool gloves "just in case" :) Anywho... I will be taking on the position of Box Offic Co-Ordinator BUT they are being ever so accomodating because of my "condition" :) We are going to get three other volunteers who will be Co-Ordinators as well.. so the 4 of us will know all aspects, policies/procedures. One of us will have to be there at every performance to supervise AND if I can't make one of my performances, then one of the others will be able to cover for me. Meanwhile, I will work with Kimberly with organizing the volunteer box office staff, scheduling, training, etc.

Last night (Saturday), Joan, Eva and I went to Christ Church Cathedral (corner of Georgia and Burrard St) to take in the concert of the Good Noise Gospel Choir, conducted by Marcus Mosely, with guest singer, Lovie Eli. What a wonderful concert! I had arranged tickets through my dear friend, Nancy Herb, who is in the choir and she had a solo number with the choir backing her up. She was wonderful!!!

Today, I had a list of apartment chores I wanted to get done and it looked like a perfect day for it. It was gray, with the threat of rain (we only got showers here and there, no like the rain we got yesterday). It was so strange to take Bridget out and all the roads were shut down to vehicle traffic because all day it was an International Triathlon. When we went out in the afternoon we did go to the road because the bicycling part of the triathlon was happening... so we stopped to watch. Ha! These are no ordinary bicyclists.. they went by so fast it was like a blur!! Anywho, I'm sure they were happy with the weather... mild, very light showers... which is better weather for them than the scorching hot of the sun overhead.

Needless to say, no chores got done. I was tired, lack of energy and had a nagging headache. So Bridget and I napped and basically vegged out. Right now, I'm on the computer (surprise, surprise) and watching the Tony Awards! (sigh) Watching them make me really wish I was in New York and could take in some of these shows!! Hahaha.. of course, if I was there right now, I would have a hard time, or a painful time, walking around... but it sure would be fun to be there!

So, that's about it... I was going to say, no rest for the wicked... but that seems to be all I've been doing is resting!

Ciao for now!

Cheryl

Tuesday, June 5th, 2007 - Retirement Seminar

Hiya Bloggy,

Hehehe.. has it been 4 days since I last posted in the blog? Sheesh... where DOES the time go? I know that part of those four days was the weekend... I had every intention of posting on the weekend because I swear (figuratively speaking) that it was the best weekend we've had weather-wise this year. We've had some nice ones, but this past weekend felt like summer-perfect weather! Not too hot and certainly not too cold! I know it will get warmer in the summer, but my ideal perfect weather is around 22C (approx. 74F). I LOVE it when it's that temperature... and not a cloud in the sky.

Anywho... I was going to write about what I was up to this past weekend, but alas, at 11:30pm as I'm writing this on Tuesday, do you think I can remember what I did on the weekend?? :) Chemo Brain strikes again! I swear, Chemo Brain is worse than menopause because there really are frequent memory lapses! I now know why I could not be doing a job that requires me to remember anything or a need for concentration. I'm hoping with time, both come back :)

Now, the one thing I do remember is that on Saturday morning, Bridget and I went down to the beach for our morning walkies instead of any of our normal street routes. The reason for this was twofold. The first was the fact it was so lovely out that playing down at the beach just seemed a natural thing to do... the second was, with this third type of chemo, one of the side affects is that I could have a reaction to my hands or feet (or both). Now the reaction could be blisters or severe drying of the skin. Of course, being me, I can't have the expected reaction (grin)... my skin is fine and there's no sign of blisters... but both heels are reacting internally. It's sort of like what you imagine it would be like to step on a tack... but in both heels. For this kind of chemo, it's not uncommon to have joint pain... and yes, I have that in places I didn't even know I had joints! I don't take steroids of any kind for this kind of chemo, so my arthritis has resurfaced, as well as the new joint pain... so walking has actually become somewhat of a challenge. One of the instructions that go with the chemo prescription is "no unnecessary walking or activity that requires being on your feet for any length of time". I now know why... and it's true, one can't do this without discomfort and a challenge. So Bridget and I can't go for any of our longer walkies.

BUT... we did make it across the road to the beach Saturday morning. And, of course we had the camera, which Miss Bridget went into pose mode as soon as she saw the camera. Here are some little Diva pictures from Saturday morning:

Hahaha... it's almost hard to find her in this picture, but she is sitting on one of the lights that light this Inukshuk at night. The Inukshuk is the inspiration for the 2010 Olympics logo.

A happy little diva on a sunny, Saturday morning. She is not allowed to run off leash on this public beach, but she is content to be a log dog (grin)

Is this not the cutest little face? She sure knows how to mug for the camera!

Somewhere earlier in the blog there is another picture very similar to this one, but it was before she had a hair cut and looked like an orphan terrier. Here she looks more civilized :)

Later that day, Greg, my hair wizard came over and trimmed my hair. He took about an inch off the length (it is much thinner than even the last time) and then he did one of his great flat ironing looks on it. Notice how much shorter it's getting?? (grin) But I really like it!

Greg and I then went out for dinner at the Boathouse pub which is just across from the park that is next door to my apartment building. After dinner, we came back to my place and went up to the roofdeck and hung out with Mimi. It was gorgeous up there Sat evening.

Sunday, I know I did something but darned if I can remember what! If I was with any of you, I'm sorry... I'm sure it will come back to me... just not there tonight :)

Monday, Rosie the Radiator broke! So I got a call at 8:15am not to come in because it could be a long wait. I explained that I had planned on going to a funeral service after the radiation session in the morning so they told me to go to the funeral and no need to rush. I could call them when I got home and they could let me know if the radiator machine was up and running and if they could get me in in the afternoon.

Mimi, Nathan, Babs, Mitsuo and I went to an elderly neighbour, Tommy's, funeral. He so loved seeing all the neighbours' dogs when they'd walk by his apartment.. he loved the dogs and talking to the neighbours. He died last week and his funeral was Monday.

When I got home, I called the radiation unit and they said they could fit me in at 3pm... so back I went to the clinic in the afternoon and got my radiation session.

Today, Michael (my ex-boss), his wife, Helen and I went to a Retirement Seminar which is put on for government employees to learn about the various options we have with our company pension plan and subsidized benefits. I learned a lot today and found out that we really do have a good pension plan, especially for those of us who will have 35 years of service in when it comes time to retire (2 1/2 years away). Now, if I could just get my investments outside of my pension plan to start making money, I'll do just fine (grin). Needless to say, Michael, Helen and I really enjoyed the seminar.

That catches me up, I think. I am about to head to bed. Tomorrow morning is another radiation session, then Nurse Donna will be over in the afternoon to flush out my portacath. If it is not used in 4 weeks, then it has to be flushed with saline solution and then heprin(sp?) which is a blood thinner, so there are no clots around the device and/or catheter that's inserted in the aorta. We will be using the portacath again when we start the IV chemo again, although Dr. Gill did say she's going to give me a couple of weeks break after the radiation/chemo I'm currently on because I do get quite tired and she doesn't want my system to totally break down.

Ok... speaking of tired... I'm off to bed!

Ciao for now!

Cheryl

Thursday, May 30th, 2007 -- The Day After!

'Evening Bloggy!

Ok, ok... I confess! I forgot to come in and update Bloggy, which I had planned on doing a couple of times. Not that there's any earth shattering updates, but I do get a few emails from some of you when a couple of days have gone by and I haven't entered anything. Hehehe... I don't mean to scare anyone! It's not a matter of me being in trouble... more like I haven't realized a couple of days have gone by... and then, I open up a new blog entry page and forget what I had last written. So hopefully I'm not repeating myself. If I do (grin), then just put it down to Chemo Brain! Although I'm not getting a lot of the "typical" chemo/radiation side affects, there is no doubt in anyone's mind that I definitely have what they call "Chemo Brain". This is where the treatments actually affect the brain, mostly the memory bank... both long term and short term. And the fun one is when you are talking about something but the word(s) that come out have nothing to do with the object/subject you are talking about! It can be quite fun trying to interpret what I've just said (grin).

Anywho... let's see. It is now Thursday night. This week is week 3 of Radiation. Today was Session #13, so I have just broken the Radiation halfway mark (which will be a total of 25 sessions).

Now, what I have noticed, and was warned would probably happen after 2 weeks of treatments, is how easily I get tired. It's a different kind of tired than when you've been up to late and have to get up early in the morning. It's more like a "fog" sets in and you know when that fog sets in you are going to be very tired where every limb seems too heavy to pick up, or to walk that extra step. There is no lead up to this fog... it just happens and you are tired. OR, as happened yesterday and today, I didn't particularly feel tired, but didn't really have any energy to do anything, so thought I would just rest and read my Ann Rule book (No Regrets). I don't think I got more than a couple of sentences read and I was sound asleep... for 3 hours! Both days! And this is why it is so important to not have the added stress of having to be at work during cancer treatments.

After my recent scuffle with the Extended Health Benefits insurance company, I now have a better understanding (and compassion) for people who do not have a Long Term Disability program with their employer, or an Extended Health Benefits package through work. These poor souls would have to try and go to work AND do their Chemo or Radiation treatments. I do NOT know how they do that. For those of you who get to see me in person, you all know how well I'm doing, physically and I think emotionally... but there is no way I could concentrate/focus on work with the Chemo Brain fog and the lack of energy/tiredness. I realize now how blessed I am that our employer supplies these benefits because I really don't know how those who don't have them can go through this journey.

Yesterday (Wed), after my nap I did have another side affect... one that I was hoping I wouldn't get (grin) and that is a case of the "runs". Hahaha... no, I will not go into detail on this (too much information!!) but suffice it to say, one needed a fair amount of Immodium and even then I wasn't sure if it would come back or not. Also, I tried drinking plenty of fluid since I knew this was one quick way of getting dehydrated.

Meanwhile, last night I had plans and I was soooo glad I went through with them and didn't cancel because of this side affect ;) My friend, Wendy Bollard, had a gig singing at the Oasis (http://www.oasisvancouver.com/). Steve C. (my friend who is one of the owners of the Oasis) and Joan (my friend and Bridget's veterinarian) and I got together to see Wendy and enjoy the evening. And enjoy we did!! We had so much fun and so many laughs! Ok, I was behaving and drinking diet coke... and did not partake in the wine that the others were. Hehehe... I haven't done a clubbing night in such a long time and this one was particularly fun. A friend of Steve and Joan's, Dean, who I met up at Paradise Valley, showed up too, and then another friend of Steve's showed up. We had a regular little group of us, which Wendy joined once she was finished for the night. Steve was so impressed with her, he wants to sign her up as being a regular singer at the Oasis, which would be fabulous because she is soooo good!

I was a good girl because I knew I had to get up and be at Radiation for 9:20am this morning, so I left at midnight, or thereabouts. The Oasis is only 6 blocks from my apartment and originally I was going to walk up and back, but considering I was feeling a little off earlier, I took the car.

Tonight... I was good and stayed home... not that I was suffering from last night at all, but then that's one of the good reasons to not drink. Not to mention, I just don't like the taste of alcohol so never have acquired the desire to drink. It has nothing to do with anything other than I just don't care for the taste of alchol... EXCEPT (there's always an exception!) for Milestone's Bellinis!! Now that's a different story :)

Ok... it's just after midnight again!! Time to head to bed, although tomorrow I don't have to be at the clinic until 12:30pm, so no rush in the morning :)

Ciao for now!

Cheryl

Saturday, May 26, 2007 - Good News!

Hiya Bloggy,

Well, I have some good news to report!! As of yesterday (Friday), the Pacific Blue Cross dispute is now over! I had sent an email to my contact, Angie, at the Public Service Agency in Victoria. She was an angel when it came to the kajillion forms that had to be filled out for the Long Term Disability application when I was still in the hospital. So I asked her if there was someone I could talk to or who could find out why I couldn't get past the switchboard with Pacific Blue Cross and all that was happening was that I was getting more and more stressed and frustrated, meanwhile nothing was happening with the "review" of the rejection of the claim for my oral chemo meds.

Well, bless her heart! She got right on it in the morning and talked to Karen who is a manager with the Benefit Programs. She, in turn, got in touch with management with Pacific Blue Cross on my behalf. Within hours, my claim was reviewed and approved. To expediate matters, I have been given the name and address of the manager at Pacific Blue Cross and I'm to send my claim form and the receipt for the Capecitabine (oral chemo) directly to her and the reimbursement will be fast-tracked. Karen worked miracles.

It still annoys me that the individual can't get through the beaurocracy... heck, can't even get through to talk to someone and this seems to be totally natural for insurance companies. Meanwhile, I don't have the energy to fight with them on a daily basis. But get the big guns involved and all of a sudden the insurance company listens. I feel so sorry for the individual who pays their monthly premiums, then when something like this happens, it's only them against the insurance company because they don't have any big guns to act on their behalf :/

BUT... the good news is that I am no longer stressed over this and Friday night I slept like a rock (if rocks sleep, then I was a sleeping rock ). I'm still a little concerned that the treatment was delayed a week, but I don't think this is going to be a big deal in the long run because had I reacted to the Radiation, we would have had to delay the chemo. Whether there would have been any impact, I guess we'll never know.

And then... some more good news (it just doesn't stop!!). Friday night I met Dad, Pat, and sister, Erin at the River Rock Casino. I was feeling on top of the world with the news about the chemo now being approved for payment. So time to have a good time... and did I ever! I only took a few dollars to gamble at the slot machines... after all, I am on a reduced income and all. Well, I was on a lucky streak... the long and short of it, I came home with $750! Enough to subsidize next month's reduced income so it's almost the same as working full time when I add it to my Disability pension. :) So a good time was had by all... especially me!!

Hahahaha... of course, you know there had to be payback time... and that was today :) I woke up this morning and it's like being in a fog! Chemo fatigue hit today and it didn't surprise me one little bit. One can't have that much excitement, then get to bed late and not expect there to be some ramifications. So today was very unproductive... and the fatigue was such that poor Bridget didn't get to go on her longer walks today. Just going around the block was a huge ordeal!

It also seems that one of the symptoms of this chemo (it's either the chemo or the radiation, but I think it's the chemo) is it is really affecting both the heels of my feet. There is a hand/foot symptom where you can break out in blisters or a skin condition (dry, peeling, etc), but this is on the inside of the heels. Almost like what a torn tendon would feel like... and it is very painful. Hence, I'm not able to walk too far right now... heck, walking period is a challenge. The weird thing with this heel pain is it comes and goes. Hopefully it is just temporary and will be gone in the near future :) I still have lots of walking to do... and a little four-legged diva who insists that we go for our morning and afternoon walkies... how can I not give in to her demands??

Well, I'm watching "What's Eating Gilbert Grape?" with (sigh) Johnny Depp! Man, is that guy one good lookin' dude! And soooo talented!! Since I stayed home tonight, I really thought that I would be able to catch up on some email... but alas, that was not meant to be. It's now 11:30pm so I don't think I'll start on email tonight. Hahahaha... tomorrow's another day... maybe I'll get some done then :)

Ciao for now! Johnny Depp is requiring my attention now :D

Cheryl

Monday, May 21, 2007 - End of Long Weekend

Hiya Bloggy,

Well, hasn't this been a very wet, gray long weekend? This is just not right for the May long weekend. Why, it seems for years it's always the Queen Vicki long weekend that the sun comes out, it's hot and this is always the first weekend I usually get a sunburn. Certainly not this year!

Actually, I had a pretty quiet weekend. I had a lot to absorb after my encounter with the insurance company rejecting the claim for the oral chemo pills I was suppose to start last Thurs. That so took me by surprise and I don't think we are finished with it yet. I can't believe that.

But Dad has come to my rescue. To either wait for the insurance company to make up their minds (which could take weeks or months, knowing insurance companies), or the alternative of going on the portable pump for 35 days... either of these two options are not doable. Waiting for the insurance company would only mean delaying my treatment that much longer, to the point I'll be back on the IV Chemo treatments... so I will have missed out on this chemo that is to work with the radiation. What the long term results would be if I don't do the chemo is anyone's guess and I don't want to chance that. Going on the portable pump for 35 days would not work for me because I can barely get through the 3 days I have to be on it when I do the IV treatments. For those 3 days my mobility is limited, and it really plays havoc with my mood. My emotions run all over the place and that plays havoc with my attitude, which is what is getting me through this journey. So 35 days would pretty much do me in and I can see where I would have a serious case of depression... which is not what I need to be battling at this time.

So Dad has told me to go ahead and get the oral (pill) form of the chemo so I don't need to think about/worry/stress over the chemo pump. He will pay for it while we go through the hassle with the insurance company... and we'll just have to take it a day at a time. And if, in the end, they still reject it... then Dad says not to worry.. it's more important that I am stress-free while I continue on with this journey.

I might also add here... some of you wonderful friends have also jumped in and said if the insurance company doesn't come through, that you would be more than willing to help out with the costs. I am blown away by all of you!! I'm not going to name names (grin) because I don't want to embarrass anyone and I know you offered out of pure friendship.. I love you all!! You know who you are :)

Meanwhile, this weekend has been productive on a Suzy Domestic front. On Saturday, I made a spaghetti and salad dinner... Jo, Greg and Steve S. came over to entertain me and get my mind back on fun stuff. It worked like a charm! We had a real fun evening and I could feel the tension of the last 3 days start to fade.

Ok... so on to Sunday! I can't believe it... after all these years (and we are talking decades), I decided that I need some REAL curtains for the windows in the living room and my crafts/eating nook. So Mimi and I headed to Ikea Sat morning and I picked up some great cotton fabric. They called these panels "bedspreads" but that's kind of a stretch of the imagination. They are perfect for curtains!

Here we have the ones in the craft area/kitchen table. Hahahaha... now I did say I got the curtains done on Sunday and put up, but I didn't say I actually did any housework (grin)!!! So the table is just a tad messy... and I can say that here it is Monday night and it's still messy!! Hey, let's not rush a good thing!! (chuckle).

Yes, erm, let's talk about my little helper, Miss Bridget. I had mentioned that this was a wet weekend, which meant Bridget had to go out in the rain for her morning constitution. Bridget doesn't mind the showers, especially if it is mild out, but she does not like the heavy rain that gets her all wet to the skin. Sunday morning was the heavy rain and I made her go out anyways because it didn't look like it was going to stop any time soon. So when we got back, all she wanted to do was sleep on her towels... so I got absolutely no help from her, not even to sit at my feet like a good dog does (grin).

Today, it wasn't quite as rainy, but it was cloudy. So I decided to attack my kitchen pantry shelves. These are the ones that I stored various baking ingredients... and kept adding to them to the point I didn't know what was in there anymore! What a mess!! There were bags of protein powders, gluten, flaxseed, etc. that had expired 2 years or more ago!! So it all got chucked out and the remaining things that are still good are neatly packed. That was an all afternoon job!!

Hahahaha... and then there was the Chemo Brain moment. Later in the afternoon, the sun actually came out (of course... the long weekend is over (grin)). So Bridget and I went out for our afternoon walkies sans the rain. When we got home, Nathan and Mimi were coming in at the same time. So we walked in together and were yakking. We got to my apartment door which I opened for Bridget, but continued talking to Mimi and Nathan in the hallway. We said our goodbyes and they went on to their apartment (2 floors above) and I went into mine, shut the door, took my coat off, etc. I then went into the living room and, no Bridget. She wasn't on the couch or on her Squirrel Watch chair. Hmmm... where did she go? I called her. Nothing. I checked the bedroom and bathroom. No Bridget. Now I'm getting a little concerned.. how can you lose a dog in a one bedroom apartment?? This time I said, "Bridget.. I've got pepperonis!!" (one of her favourite treats)... nothing.

Hmmm.. could she have followed Mimi and Nathan upstairs??? Naaaaa.. one of them would have brought her right back down. But, I opened the apartment door and was going to go up there because I just couldn't figure out where she would be. Well, as soon as I opened the door, there sitting in the hallway in front of the door was my little Bridget. She would have heard me calling her and saying I had pepperonis but she knows she's not allowed to bark in the common hallways, so she just sat there, waiting for me to open the door (grin). That's the first time I've lost my dog in the hallway (grin)!

Well, it's getting late so I better sign off for the night. Tomorrow is another day. I go for my radiation treatment at 11:30am and have to get my bloodwork done, either before or after. And will see if I'm meeting with Dr. Gill while I'm there, or if she will say to go ahead, pick up the prescription and start it tomorrow ... or if she has another plan in place.

Never a dull moment!! But hey, I have new curtains AND a tidy pantry!!! (grin)

Ciao for now!!

Cheryl